"I wish I could tell you how I feel
"
And show you what's inside of me is real
I dont know what I'm waiting for
I can't explain it anymore
-Paramore - My Number One
[Click to enlarge. I laughed so much.]
Well well bonjour mes copines, comment allez-vous? Just kidding, as if I could actually blog full time in French. The Christmas exam for it was a train reck and a half, It's not like you can actually study for comprehensions so I was walking in like uhmm, okay, here we go. So I've only got two Exams left, I should be able to to them both tomorrow, then have a great day on Tuesday but I can't cause my school is a bitch. Ah well.
Christmas in 4 days. I'm getting more and more excited now that its so close. I cannot wait. New phone, giftcard for iTunes, surprises etc. Fun times. Have all the lights up around the house, when you drive past you'd honestly think our house fell out of somewhere in Vegas or something. It's funny.
Just heard there that Brittany Murphy died. I am so shocked. That was so unexpected. Wow. She was only 32. So young. So beautiful. RIP.
Ughhh, exams are like finally amost over, study period and Irish tomorrow and I am finished. Finally. It feels like they've been going on forever. Blech. Tests are horrible. I have probably failed at least 3 by now. I don't really care that much tbh.
Cut my own fringe last night, whoops. Hhaha. It looks worse than it did originally. I was tryna even it all out cause its growing unevenily and it was getting annyoying. Ahh I'll just clip back the bad bits.
Wednesday, I have plans to go into town, bad idea cause it's gonna be beyond freezing but Efa and myself need christmas clothes, might see someone too ;) Fingers crossed.
This is such a choppy post sorry, am dabbing in and out of random pieces of info. Sure what does it matter anyway. :)
This is a short ass post. I was gonna go on a big "No confidence/I hate myself" type rant but like, actual effort. I really haven't got the energy. Maybe another day.
Just a big shout now too.... Efa, Jemma, Lucy, Danny and Diarmuid. They've been so awesome lately.
Speaking of no energy, yeah like wtf? I actually have like nooo energy lately, I think I need to start taking Centrum again, they were working grand for me a while ago, then I just kept forgeting to take em and now I'm all multivitamin deprived. Bleh.
Click
HERE to go to a video I found on Youtube like..30 seconds ago, already in love. Thanks to Diarmuid for giving me the Boyce Avenue URL. ♫
Pictureee Time. Update on my vanity:
Sorry, but I almost like that picture =]
Put down a comment over there.
Laterrrrr ♥
Georgia .x.
Labels: Christmas, friends, selfhatred
From the top... || 2:43 PM
Date : Saturday, November 28, 2009
"I was Dreamer before you went and let me down...."
-Taylor Swift - White horse
[Written on Thursday]
It's so painfully cold outside. It's days like this where I'm thankful for the fact that I come into a warm house and I've got a family and stuff like that. Coincidentally it's Thanksgiving this week. Happy Thanksgiving to random readers from America. Haha, as if anyone from the vast country of America would actualy read this lil thing. No.
Got dreadful pains in my stomach/general abdominal area. Don't know what it is. I feel like I could get sick but I won't and its really uncomfortable and painful. Ow. Ow. Ouch. It's really sore anywhoo.
I like Thursdays. I think they're very chilled. Time table is quite nice and relaxed. Nothing too major. Chemistry last class which I love. IT and Religion middle of the day which is great cause I just get to sleep like right through them. Today I found out we get a Religion Christmas text. What?!
[Written on Friday]
This blog is way overdue. Ah well. Interruptions and lack of proper writing momentum interferes with it all. Went to yc tonight. Cause its Friday. This week sucked major donkey balls. There was hardly anyone there. This blog was originally started on... Thursday. Ah well. Still have them abdomin pains and I am sorta concerned but at the same time I'm tryna stay calm cause like I guess worrying isnt exactly going to help.
[Written on Saturday]
Gave my mom my christmas list there the other night. Like a tiny lil A6 page with 4 things on it. Phone, iTunes giftcard, this boots hair trimmer thingy and surprises. If any. I love christmas though, for al the cliché reasons like the all day fires, the atmosphere, the way its the only time of year our house gets more than one visitor a day on most occaisions, the stinging of the colder air in the mornings on my bare face as I wait for the bus or the smell of the evergreen and the inevitable trail it will leave behind it when you bring it in the house.
I'd love a necklace like that. [Totally not hinting or anything.] It's just so simple and sweet but with the right outfit it could make such a statement.
[**WARNING: I GET REALLY MEAN ON MYSELF HERE SO DON'T READ IT IF YOU DONT WANT TO. AND IF YOU'VE GOT NEGATIVE THINGS TO SAY YOU CAN SHOVE THEM UP YOUR ASS CAUSE I DON'T CARE**]
Ugh, I could just go on a huge "Boys are stupid assholes" type rant but that section of my life is just so focking dull right now. So here's my view on myself. Ugh. Like seriously? Like most of the time I only get attention from lads if they just take me as a mate or if they're taking the piss. It's not fair, been happening since first year and I really and truly sick of it altogether. I get I'm not the prettiest of all girls, I'm not the skinniest, I'm not the funniest, I'm not the dream girl that most lads have in mind but like I'm just so sick of it just being so same story all the fucking time. I know that I overthink the littlest things but like I can help it? It upsets me so much that I'm 16 and have only have one boyfriend. One. It makes me feel so rejected and not right in some way. I try to put on this little act that most people believe and it's great cause I dont have to explain why I'm sad on the inside all the fucking time. It's just a general feeling of lonliness I guess. Even with the first fella I had it wasn't really even a proper relationship it was a week that I got to see him twice in. Now when I see him I just don't know what to say or anything it makes me feel so shit about myself that I fucked it up. I know it was my fault I know it was so don't anyone try tell me different. I wish I didn't hate myself so much. I wish I had some sort of confidence to work with. I wish I wasnt so fucking quiet sometimes.
I must try work on happier posts but its pretty difficult when in my head all I can think of is someone going "stop fucking bragging about your life" and besides its way easier to be down on yourself than it is be kind to yourself. I admire those who have confidence.
But yeah I'm gonna go now.
Comment please.
Georgia .x.
Labels: abdomin pains, Christmas, cold weather, selfhatred
From the top... || 1:32 PM
