"Yeah, and it's difficult
Letting you down
Knowing it's all my fault"
-Cheyeene Kimball - These four walls
*WARNING: THE FOLLOWING POST IS WAY OVER DRAMATIC. IF YOU HAVEN'T GOT ANYTHING NICE TO SAY ABOUT IT THEN FUCK OFF CAUSE I'M NOT INTERESTED*
Hmm, it's weird. Lately I feel like I've been drifting alot- and I'm crying alot. It's as though I've got loads on my mind and then it's like I haven't. I really don't know what to think. It's just so much fucking easier to tell people your fine and put on a happy front than it is to like explain why your upset or "not yourself". That's a phrase that's being used alot in my direction lately. I know I'm not myself.I've been forgetting things and noticing that I'm actually really quiet in classes and like am only speaking when I'm directly spoken to. Other than that I seem to be quiet as a mouse. It's so weird cause before shit started happening I was like talk talk talk but now I'm just like *inner thoughts* "sshhh keep to yourself dude." and like I had so many people say to me "aw you kay? your not really yerself" I just use the easiest excuse and say I'm tired and yeah I know that's like the most typical thing you could possibly come out with but it is partically true and like I really don't know what's made me act out of sorts over the last few weeks but like, it's even got to the point where I'm upsetting myself and I don't know what to do cause everyone has their own problems and I always feel really bad if I was to unload on someone else. Like seriously I've bewildered myself because I can't even get an answer. And yeah okay part of it is me feeling like all depressed about not having a boyfriend when people are talking about their other halves and like it's like I really don;t know what I'm to say cause I'm like "shut up at least you have a boyfriend/girlfriend". I hate fucking singlness so fucking much like grrr at singleness. It's so fucking stupid like I know I'm 16 but like I hate being single and blah blah blah. Ughh I'll just end up crying again so I'm gonna shut up.
Today was good. Went liffey valley with the people [Lucy, Efa, Sionnan, Elise Cliff [ for a little while] buttons, chris, martin, sean, danny, dan, nicky and gary] it was real fun. Went to starbucks, most people got something. Then we saw A Christmas Carol in 3d and took like 2 pairs of glasses each [except buttons he took 3 cause he had a theory...] anyway yeah it was so cool. I had never seen a 3d movie before and of course its such a new experience and like it was so funny the trailers were in 3d and i was al "ahh omg its gonna hit mee!!" and like hiding in elise. Quite the hilarious and then Dan was on my other side and we made jokes about like everything that was said. No one else was being quiet in the whole fucking cinema so why should we? Then we went to the food court and squished around a table. Funny stuff. Then were were like ughh can we go? Then at the bus stop me efa lucy elise and sionnan sang songs in a circle and didn't give a fuck what anyone else thought. Well no one could really hear I don't think cause of the noise of the motor way. Then I got home and watched Xfactor and got a chinese.
My hair is not being very co-operative lately. There's one little fucking flick on the back and its all like grrr straighten you motherfucker! But it never does. So like the rest of my hair is grand but then I turn my head and it sticks out like a fish on sandpaper. Not cool at all.
YC was sooo funny yesterday. We got told off for having fun. Then Matt started making me laugh and I was like omg stoppp haha. I'd just like to state that we are teenagers and are tempted at succeeding in breaking rules so give us a fucking break alright? sheesh.
Hamlet essay to do tomorrow. Grr. I hate the pressure teachers are already putting on us about leaving cert. Shut up. Ughh whatever.
Can't be bothered publishing more. Envy at Danny and Lucy for being able to blog way more than I can. [love you guys really though xD]
Comment my goddamn blog. Social fail if you don't.
Georgia .x.
Labels: anger, friends, Hair, homework, Liffey Valley, youth club
