"It's so confusing understanding you it's making me not want to do the thing that I know I should do but I trip fast and then I lose, and I hate looking like a fool "
Ever feel like there's everything on you mind and at the same time it's absolutely nothing? Like you've the weight of the world on your shoulders but then again it's nothing? It's so weird. Thats how I've been feeling over the last few days, it's like I'm there physically, mentally I'll all over the gaff. Gone back into my shell recently, it's strange. I don't get it. Music is a release for me, I can sit and listen to music for hours and hours and it'll make me feel better. As sad and loner-like as it may seem, I do get a good mood out of lip synching to songs like Florence and The Machine or Scuba Dice or 30STM or Kate Nash [who btw is playing the academy soon €21. Just sayin] I dunno. I think I just need to screm or cry or just stay in bed for w eek and wish it all away, but I don't know what I'd be wishing away because everytime I think about what's wrong I just think that I'm the one over reacting and like.. yeah.
Failed an ECDL test by 3% today. 3. Thats just gay. Ughhhh. Like just proper stupid. I have to pay a fucking tenner to repeat now. ffs. Growl. Lol.
Today is St Patricks day, nawhhh haha, a bunch of us headed to town to see la parade and chill, it was lotsa fun, then the group split in half and we all ran back together for food and a bus home, happy days. Then we came back to Celbridge and went to la playground. I feel french tonight. The day was long, and warm, and sunny skies and patriotics flooded the streets of Dublin in mass produced, novelties such as over-sized hats, Leprechaun costumes and plastic horns. It's nice to see the whole freakin' country basically piled down the middle of Dublin to see 60,000 people walk down and be stared at. Happy happy days. Late morning tomorrow. Scoreee. I Miss English waheyy xD
Head is soo melted lately over everything and nothing. Friends in need are friends indeed is what I think and I love being there for my friends and it makes me smile knowing that they trust me and are willing to open up to me.. Uhm, yeah. Random point of info.
Been thinking lately, it's acutally a release for me to be best mates with guys, that's like Cliff, Diarmuid, Keith, Jonny and stuff. It's a sense of security to know that if anything happens I got them at my side if ya get me? Yeah. :)
I have had a hundred million songs running through my head all day, first two classes was a song my dear darling Elise was singing this morning, even though I could only remember two lines of a verse and so forth, then Cobra Starship's "Hot Mess" crept in during English. I've benn so unbelievably spacey these days it's so weird, I just run scenarios through my mind, things that I'd love to happen but I know they never will. Just, yeah, it's like I try convince myself if I don't imagine it happening then theres a chance it will? I'm a bit strange like that. Uhm, Yeah best not to ask.
So 5th Year is organising a MONSTER cake sale, we're all getting involved. Karen and Lorainne are heading it. It's for Can- Teen and I'm happy that it's for a cause that means so much to everyone in our year/school. It's gonna be like military setting it up cause each year group gets only 10 mins. So. Yeah.
Mother has perhaps hinted my hair-cut next week? Sooo excited. I'd love that to happen. I really don't like my hair right now. If it's long enough to tie back it needs a cut, that the way I view my hair. Jus' sayin'.
Grades are picking up, except for an Economics test this morning. That was a fail and a half. Jesus. I studied for what I thought would be on the test and it turned out that it was the two chapters BEFORE the chapter I had studied. FML. I'll just ask her when I get it back if I can repeat, It shouldn't be a problem. I hope.
Mother's day and little sister's birthday on Sunday. Hmm. Need money to get little sister something. Hmm. Considering town on Saturday with Efa is she passes over the Tummy bug and if she's feeling up to it. Hope so <3
Hmm.. Mother also said she'd take me to Penny's in Newbridge over Easter holidays to cheaply do over my wardrobe, and new jeans in New Look me hopes. xD
Ah happy days lately, keep thinking about things, things I don't think I should be thinking about... confusedddd. Ahhh!
I'm sorry that the majrity of my posts lately are about school work and stuff, but cmon, I'm in there 5 days a week, I literally live for the weekends, where I can just pan out with the guys and the girls. But yeah, gimme a break k? Grand.
How does the old somehow tie in with the new? I don't know I just thought it was a cool question. Feel free to answer. Feeling so unloved with the sheer lack of comments. Feeling like shutting this down or something, cause no one really cares about it. I just post the link to my twitter or facebook now and again when I actually do feel like a post is worth reading. Or if I feel as I do now and just want someone to read and comment. Yeah. I'm a bit weird.
The sun is all shining and pretty lately. Sunday was a pure taster of what this summer will be like,[minus the 6 degree weather] we had ice cream and energy drinks, iPods and rugby balls, half the high green to ourselves. Which is always nice. It was like reminiscing but in the present if you understand? It felt so cool and everyone was in such a good mood, so for future refrence I am saying ROLL ON SUMMER 2010!! :D
Things are chilled lately. Skin went mental there over the last few days on my arms and stuff. Yuck. I couldn't even look at it without that voice in my head going "REPULSIVE" so I chose to cover it and smile.
Mom says I can't get my hair cut tomorrow but perhaps some time next week. Sooooo excited. I have pictures.. somewhere, of what I want done. Getting another bob is so boring I think a picture can be often quite off-putting for some people cause they find it difficult to picture your face with the fancy persons hair, hairdressers are meant to make your hair suit your face, not zactly like whats in the pic. I want a short, spikey type bob thing. Not like a boy, not a long bob, just, yeah, with lots of layers cause my hair is so damn thick.
Grades are going up thank f00k. I was like "OMG disappointment to parentals, guilt trip much?" lately but now I'm all "lets study at the same time of homework" which seems to be working for me.
Ohh Happy Dayssss <3
This post is short and shitty. Yay.
I just have no momentum to write lately.
Stefan gets a heyy cause he's cool and mentioned me in his blog there yesterday. Much love to him cause he's such a caring cool guy. Easter what? what? xD Well, maybe. And he's all techhy getting an iPad. btw. Yeh. So beat that for a kick-ass friend. And if there was an award for the nicest guy in Ireland, dude, no competition. <3
Efa too cause I just love her. oh wow. she's so beautiful. wow. yeah. :D Saturday with her is gonna be awesomeee. BMA 4evsss what? :D
Totally loving Leona Lewis' new song. Absoltuely. Heard it once and was like OMG. I need. Easy listen too if it counts. Blah, talking to myself.
So the past few days have been chilled, I was panicing the other night going OMG I can't do English homework but I got through it,only left one blank but it was the one everyone left blank. Oh Patrick Kavanagh how you phase me. >.>Quotes test today, went well, better than my last one anyway. French oral work to do for friday, uhm, yeah, I am not just rambling off my list of things I have to and posting them on the internet. Not at all... *cough cough*. So yeah. Oh just for anyone reading who cares, 90% in a Maths test. Booyah! :D Mom was well satisfied. Considering the week before I left HL Maths I had only got 3% and I am still holding that they were attempt makrs, I dismissed them so I really got a big fat zero percent. Happy days. Proving alot that I couldn't have handled HL. That didn't make sense. Hmm. Note to self: Make sense with ramblings from inner-mind. Kbai.
That's basically my school life updated. Aw yeah, everyone know this Trócaire Fast coming up? I'm doing a sponsered silence. So that means, not a peep. I have to write everything. Gonna be impossible. But I am determined to prove I can go 24hrs without utter a sound. Coughing DOES NOT count. I Checked.
Things as regards others are still the same, I don't know how to feel about one person but I have feelings for someone I don't think I should and it's not who most people would think it is and I still amen't telling anyone so I wouldn't waste your breath on asking me cause I won't say. I'm still talking to someone very nice too.
Hello to Efa btw. I love her so many. Just, yeah, so many. I would be so lost without her. I love her so much. She's the bomb. We want to destroy it. She eats babies. I love her. xD <3 BMA
And Elise, she's the bestest person in a long long long long time. I love her way too much it's not sane. It's like, dude, like so much, like seriously, it's not containable, i just like love you like so much like its like totally like crazy.
BFF :D
And Diarmuid cause he's been badgering me for a mention. Jk. He's cool dude. Best matesss wha? Not much ore needs be said. Haha, nawh, yeah. Ehm. Yeah. Hi :) So yeah. :D Mentioneddddd.
Hello to YOU btw. Yes, you reading. Hey there, thanks for reading.
I think I'm getting a cold again. Ugh. Are you serious immune system? Like really? Wow. I thought once I started being good and doing stuff, and takin' my neurofen I'd be fine but no, Mr Immune system, this isn't enough for you. My chest is at me again, cough cough at the most inconvienient of times. I hate my immune system, it'll fight off swine flu, won't fight off the common cold. Weird? Yes.
Gahh! Frustration over.
The Notebook is on tonight. Watch it. It's the epicest love story of all time. It always makes me cry at that one particular point. Ahh.
Spring me here btw. Ask anything. Within reason obviously.
In a fab mood today for anyone who didn't pick it up. xD
The feeling is back in my hands. I lost it for about an hour or two today out with people. It was fun. Same old routine. Never gets boring. Well, not really anyway. Was supposed to chill with Keith today but plans got changed so yeah.. Maybe some other time. So yeah and that was basically it and then they hooked up [kinda] and yeah. Driving home in the car I quickly glanced out the window and saw the moonlight hitting off the clouds illuminating their outline, away up there in the sky. Making them look like puffy silver bursts of...something. It was serene, almost like an escape.
I don't know why these teenage mood swings keep hitting me so bad, but they are. I mean, I'm so happy one minute, then I suddenly get a wave of emotion and I feel like I just want the ground to open up into the firey pits of hell and I want to jump in. How bad is that? Either that or I feel like I could just break down to tears at any given moment. I hate how my mood goes from one extreme to the next, I feel like that's what could be tiring me out too because I even pick up on it sometimes. God. Something. *sigh* Now, ladies and gents, we have the wave of emotional shatter where I feel I could just break down crying because it's like I'm kidding myself over someone. I know something I shouldn't and it's killing me. I feel for a person I shouldn't. I'm confused over everything and nothing. I don't know what to do because I feel like I can't trust some people these days and I know they'll find out and it's just be a big fight waiting to happen. It's so frustrating. But I try to forget the things I know and shouldn't. It works for a while but then when people leave, I'm alone and it all runs straight back to my mind, going around and around like a spiral. Going down. I hate this. It better go away. So basically don't mind me if I go on a mad one with you, it's not me, it's a stupid mood swings. I'm gonna leave all the horriblness to my alter-ego. Amelia. She's a bitch. Get back in your box Amelia. I hate you too.
Wanna know what really sucks? I'll only stick this at about one sentence. Being "just a friend" with someone you realise you really really like. I know one person reading this will immediately think "OMFGZ I know who she's talking about" I'm sorry dear, no you don't. Everyone presumes I like people. It's amusing but even if they say the right person I say no. I have deicded I'm not telling anyone who I like anymore. It always gets back to the person and just gets wrecked so I'm not telling anyone who I like anymore. The person I thought I was starting to like turned out that I don't like that person so much cause that person likes another person and such people shall remain unnamed. But lets put it this way, it is not who you all think it is. Fun times or what?
It's weird but I often feel like when I get these down slumps in my mood that I can write reams and reams of blog. But I end up deleting majority of it cause its too weird and dark and bitchy and incomprehenable.
My blog is so bad. Crapola. Maybe shut it down? Comment and let me know mmk?
Shouts now to:
Stefan: cause he said some really nice things about my blog in a tweet and I felt so cool getting kind words from him. Yay. Tea. Yeah. I Love Him. Best Buds <3
Jemma and Ash: cause I said I'd give them a mention sometime and here you are.I Love You girliess <3
Keith Campbell: cause he's deadly in general. Phone call with him last night was cool. We WILL make chicken one of these days babe I swear xD gonna teach me xbox whatt? xD Ah I love him cause he's amazing. Love Youuu. Bestie Friendss <3
Comment me or @reply to me on Twitter here if you want a mention k? Good.
Formspring box has been added to this page too. Keep the questions within reason okay? Nice positve ones. Stop giving out to me aswell. So uncool. Grow up and comfront me in person if you got a pair okay?
New music added to my iTunes last week thanks to the wonderful Cliff. Loaned me The Used, Madina Lake, The All-American Rejects and YouMeAtSix. Totally in love with music these days. The night Chris left my iPod in his house I was so cranky it was like music depravation. God. How sad does that sound? But yeah, last Friday night was cool beans, Sami, Elise, Keith and Cliff came back to mine and chilled. We got fat. Ice cream was fought over, pizza was demolished is about 10 minutes, crisps were tucked into and tea was drank [apart from Keith who only drank a tiny bit >.> jk ilu]
In that small period of being between dreaming and deep sleeping I had a thought the other night, inspired (if that's the right word), by a spring a had gotten the other day asking me to describe my perfect world. Well the thoughts that I had about the ideal world in which I'd like to live. Idealy being a world where I could do whatever the frick I want, I'd never have to do school work, ever. It's be sumer all the time and we'd never get bored, there'd be no drama whatsoever, my iPod wouldn't die in the middle of really good songs, just yeah, I want things to be the was they were around July/August of this year. Things were so cool then. I want this summer to be like that summer. Haha, this for that, awh if only.
I've had constanst headaches this week, I'm putting it down to school stress. 5th year is tough shit. Whether people believe me or not, for me it's tough. The annoying thing is that, as much as I'm hating it and blah blah poeple who've done are like like "work from 5th year onwards" I'm there like "Uhm, 5th year is nearly over STFU I can do it next year." Which I can, I'm optimistic, which is good, which means that I believe I can carry out things. Whichever way they go. I don't really care. No I do. Ughhh. Stress. Shut up patronising me and baby-ing me through school. I'm doing it my way.
Not that long till Easter. Thank the feck. Two weeks of doing absolutely feck all, town trips, nicer weather me hopes, proper shopping.
This post is absolute crapolaaa. I cannot write anything of intrest lately. FML. Jk.
I'm get off this before I cry with patheticness. Haha.
I looked out the window a few minutes ago before I started to write this, out my bedroom window, I looked up into the cold navy sky, illuminated by the smudged glow of the ever shining moon - like a torch in a dark room - and I saw one star. One tiny little twinkle. Almost symbolising some form of hope, as in everything that swirling around my mind, occupying my thoughts, would be okay. I wish everyone could have seen that one little star. It wasn't even the brightest one in the world, but it was still there. Hope is a funny thing, it's so hard to gain but yet, the easiest thing to give up. It's like the opposite of love. Love is so easy to get and so hard to let go of. Sometimes you can't let go of it, sometimes you want to hold on to that tiny spark between you and that someone and you wish that it'll turn to something. Even if it's barely anything, you can still have hope in love. Opposites attract eh?
Midterm is going well, today, we as always, crashed in Martin's house. Made tea, I nearly scalded my hand off because he made me spill the tea. Good job >.> Then we, [Sarah Breen[who is very cool btw<3], Lucy and myself] Googled hot guys, such as Jared Leto, Chace Crawford, Hugh Jackman etc. and Youtubed funny videos such as "Man boobs" and "shut up woman get on my horse" thats also a website btw. just squish it altogether and put a dot com and the end and enjoy.
There's a weird feeling in the air these days, it's like it's trying to be summer but winter won't release it's grip over us. It's crazy. Darn global warming and all that. Yeah, thought I'd mention that.
Everyone's posts are like way longer than mine. Envy envy. *said in evil voice*
[Click to enlarge. It's cool.]
I need to go shopping, like way bad. I need new jeans, more tops, a good quality band hoodie, Madina Lake maybe? Comment and Let me know, cause I'd feel weird buying a F.O.B hoodie now they've broke up 'n' all.Let me knoww mmk?
I need new make up too, like, some colourful eye-liners or something. And hair dye. I am determined to dye my hair black before Easter Holidays. Everyone dyes their hair when they're teenagers. And piss off saying that it'll "destroy my hair". Have you not seen all the colour care shizz on the market nowadays? Duh. I'm grand.
But yeah. This post is rather shitty if I do say so myself. I've no.. mojo to write these days or something without feeling the need either to get angry, cry, both, or get really horribly bitchy. I dunno.
Iworry about my friends too much, I know I do. But I'd be a pretty shitty friend if I didn't I always want whats best for them, or if I wasn't that shoulder to cry on when they needed me, even if it doesn't come across as that all the time, I do only ever want them to be happy. I don't ever want bad things for people I care about.
This post actually, I just realised, is so self-centred. Blah. I hate when I get like this.
I'ma sign off before I start taking digs at myself.
"I've got mixed up memories and I've got favourite places"
-Kate Nash - Mouthwash
I'm going to take a minute just to remember Joe, he died this week.
RIP lil man. <3
It's a really cold evening, the top of my back and my neck are realy sore. Paracetomal isn't working. I'm tired and I keep getting sudden leg spasms. I've got iTunes playing and a cup of tea beside me, two tea bags, four sugars and a bit of milk. Nothing new really is it?
So, Friday, lets see, chilled until twas time for YC and chilled there too, they had a minute silence for Joe which was really respected and nice to do. Then we headed bakc to Elises for a sleepover which was so awesome. Dancinggg. And things we won't talk about or ask about. Right? Grand.
Today was Valen-shites day. Some people wet to town, others, like myself, stayed in Celbridge and went out. So we chilled in Martins, wnet to the Chinese and then came home. Whilst in Martin's we made tea and took pictures, well Efa and I did, 29 pics to be exact. Now stored in my phone. I love her. Efa, your so awesome ilu always BMA <3
Last night, the parents were away fpr the night, being it Valentines weekend and such, so, I had a free house. How did I spend it? Watching a movie with little sister with chicken and chips from Pizza Hut, then finished it by watching The Time Travellers Wife in bed, crying to myself at the end. Seriously watch that movie, it's so sad. Such a beautiful story line. Eric Bana, I love you.
Uhm, so yeah, I really don't know what to write about right now.
Midterm should be good, a week off thank puck. Seeing all the regular peeps daily, sometimes nightly ;)
Town on Tuesday with Brid..maybe? Uhm, ohhhh and getting super fat with Cliff on Friday :D Yaaay. He's so cool. And we are, as established on Friday evening, bestiest friends foreverest <3
So, I rubbed sugar on my lips earlier and they taste sweet now, literally. Simple exfoliator, and it stimulates blood circulation, well, so I read. They feel exfoliatd anyway so yeah. Fun times.
down to 59 Followers on Twitter. I feel so unloved. *que sad music* Yeah, if your not my follower on Twitter... um..You should be. Cause Sadly, alot of my "followers" are just spammers and it make me sad. xD
Well I'll wrap this up now.
Formspring. Ask anything remember? HERE is the link.
Listen to that song. I lovee it right now. I've given up trying to find it on my iPod when it's on shuffle, I'd rather just selectively find it and put it on repeat and listen again and again. Click here to have a good aul listen. Its awesome. I found We The Kings on Scuzz on Sunday cause I lounged around all day in m'pjs because I wasn't aloud out cause it's Sunday and..something.. ehh.. yeah but anyway, found them, loved them, downloaded them. Also downloaded a whole bunch of YM@6 and Kids in Glass Houses. I Love RealPlayer.
Valentines day, holy [several censored expressions of emotion]. Now I am not someone thats like "awh no I hate Valentines cause it's so commercialised and shizz", nawh, it's cause I'm alone. I don't actually even care anymore how shallow and moany that sounds. I hate singleness. It's horrible. The inevitable feeling of rejection is awful. I appreciate the kind words of people though when I do manage to string a few words together of just how much crap being single makes me feel, but uhm yeah, I on't go on about it again. Bottom line: This years "V-Day" is gonna suck arse for me. Why? Hmm. Take a wild guess.. [sarcasm]
The last few days in school have felt like an eternity, I swear, holy god, like seriously, if this week were going any slower it'd be going backwards. I think it's because everyone is just waiting on midterm at this stage. It's like your watching the clock, counting the mintues till we're free or something.As terribly cliché as that may sound, I can say it.
French breakfast first class tomorrow cause my awesome teacher knows none of us are in the mood for actual work so yeah. This post is rather shitty. Hmm.I should really do something about that.
All the melo-drama lately is so weird, I won't elaborate on it right now and I probably won't ever really cause it's all kinda calmed down now, but like, it's so weird.
Wanna know what super sucks gay donkey balls? When people lie to you, or don't give you the whole story. I've really been, shaken, lets say at the revalation of people lying to me latel, and lying to my face especialy, phuck off if your gonna lie to me. So beyond uncool. Do not be my friend if your gonna lie to me, form right now, don't ever lie to me. No body. I'd never lie to you so don't ever lie to me. Just thought I'd clear that up.
I really can't think of more to write about so I'm gonna wrap it up by giving out a few mentions:
Stefan: Always a good friend, always there when I need him. We really do need a catch up over midterm [fingers crossed] he's just generally cool and awesome so yeah. His blog is filled with interesting clips of last nights dreams or general blogging material or yeah. Check it out here. Love him <3
Keith: Awh wow, this dude is so awesome. Jump hugs. That's all that needs saying. ;) Nawh, seriously he's a deadly guy, such a good friend. Xbox.. well. I tihnk if I slam xbox there's a chance I'll be disowned as a friend so I'd rather not have that! Haha, nawh he's really awesome. And one of these days we will get fat :D ilu dude <3
Diarmuid: Well, what to say really, he texts back nice and fast, always a plus in my books xD. Calls when he's walking home..uhm.. yeah..appreciate that..? Nawh, yeah, uhm.. I forget where I'm going with this, basically, he's one of my best mates and he's awesome so yeah. ilu too dude :D
Well, here we go, on a bit of a Scuba Dice buzz, hence the song lyrics being words from their ever so catchy song "16 Mandatory". I am really loving them right now, I think I said that perhaps two ro three posts ago? Not too sure but yeah, get your ears hooked on them, they are very cool, they sound like a little bit more of a punky type version of Fall Out Boy. Hmm. This post could end up being super crappy but sure, ah well. Goddam it I'm doing that thing where I type whats going on in my head. Ugh.
sSo I did not get picked for the pretty selection of being Prefect for 2010. Ah well. Life goes on. Congrats to Eimear andSarah though. It's weird being in class with them now knowing they're looked upon better than you are now and will be for the next 12 months. It's almost surreal. It's like yeah okay they are the same people but now it's like everybody knows who they are. Weird. Like not everyone knows all the prefects but they know they "two figure heads of the school" as my mother kindly put it. Then I was reassured by my sister that it's fine "now I can focus on my studies" haha. Right. Yeah. Well, fine, I reackon I can try. It's still in my head all the time to study and work harder, but like, effort. That makes me sound so unbelievably bad but yeah, 5th year is tough stuff.
Looking at a picture infront of me fromt he lastest issue of Easy Food, curtosey of mummy dearest. Wow. The Hot Chocolate Sundae it like.. om nom nom on the page. I think I'll make one. Not now obviously.. Weekend perhaps? Hmm
Piktur:
So, yeah, I did not do what I had intended to do this evening, I instead was on the phone for an hour and then chilled on this for another to pass time and to simply procrastinate.
And I'm procrastingating now. So I will finish this crappy post....
Well well, from my previous, very brief post, you can pretty much guess that I changed my Twitter URL. Fun. I felt i neded a change. Even if it was just removing numbers and inserting an underscore to it. I've changed the link in my info box to the right too just incase you wanna know. My very proud 54 followers, granted about 20 of them are total spammers but still, they all add up. I'm such a Tweek, that is a Twitter geek incase anyone didn't catch that. So uhm, yeah, things are fairly chilled right now, lacking seriousy in the education department, we should really be aloud to submit stuff via Facebook. Like really, thats where most people end up complaining they get distracted from work anyway. If I was ever a teacher [pa-ha!] I'd just let my minions submit their work via Facebook mail. It's be so much easier, like hello? 21st century? Second decade to be exact. they amount of typo's on this is unreal. I'm father's laptop submitting htis post cause I cant be arsed going upstairs and asking little sister to get off the main computer. So I've got a laptop, Twitter tab on standby, my trusty iPod, and an urge for tea. brb.
*goes to make tea*
*has tea and a KitKat*
So much better with tea. So, I got the Swine flu jab there on Thursday just gone. Ow. Motherhoe. That really really really hurt. I've a lump on my arm now cause of it. Arm was throbbing for a few days and generally made me very moany and bleh. But I'm grand now except for a pain in my shoulder but that'll pass I've a feeling it could've just been they way I slept. I woke up this morning and thought "oh lord. It's Monday. Irish second class. Bugger" We ended up not dong much except translating a letter and things of that easy nature. Well it is Ordinary level after all. We're starting to do oral work now, which is grand for me cause I actually find speaking Irish is grand but it's the reading in class, any class, that gets me, it's like everyone's ears that ca hear are killing me inside. It's horrible, It's almost like stagefright. Ugh. Public speaking? Eh.. I am not your girl for that. Not a hope in hell. LOL. I just typed "gril" instead of girl. I love little typos like that. There's probably like a hundred in this post already but I don't care to be quite honest.
I wonder if you have to an artist to be a florist? Anyone know? Feel free to comment and let me know.I dunno where to go as regards carrers choices. Ughh. Sitting in carrers every Monday and it's almost like they expect us to know what we want to do already? Really? Dude, I'm 16. Give. Me. A. Mother. Plucking. Break. Mmk? Thanks.
I want my hair to be cut. Very very short. I know I won't get parents approval but it's worth a shot. I want something like what I have Googled here. Except I have about as much hope as trying to get a fish to sit on dry sand for 3 hours in the Sahara. Unlikey. Grr. It's be so much easier. Even if just to take the weight off cause my hair is so thick so it'd be sooo much easier to manage, and my hair is at the stage where it's at an awkward length where I don't like it. Please feel free to @reply to me on twitter with some short hairstyles. Would be much appreciated. Thank you.
I don't wanna finish this post just yet, lets see, what to talk about...haha.Typing exactly what's in my head right now.
Awh, the weekend, yeah, that was good. On friday, well, it was just YC, but Saturday was really good, went to town with some peeps for Tadgh's birthday. Went to Mikkie D's, Forbidden Planet, then Cinema to see Toy Stroy2 3-D. It was so freakin' awesome. I love 3-D movies. Woo. It was such a childish day, walkin round town, screaming whilst running across the road when the little pedestrian light man turned yellow and cars revved to keep charging though the roads of Dublin's fair city. Getting eggs pelted at us..?uhm, yeah don't ask about that part, we're not to sure what happened, none of us were hit though, thankfully.
There's a movie coming out two days before Valintines day, convieniently named "Valintines Day". I'm prediciting being alone for Valintines day, yet again. FML. Grr at singleness and all that. I'm sure your bored hearing, well in this case reading, about my singleness and how annoyed I am about it. Ugh. "dessssssperadooooo" those are the lyrics coming to mind. Boo. Oh and the every so popular Akon "Lonely, I'm mr. Lonely, I have no body of my ooowwwnn". Bleh. Shut up emo-mind of mine.
Mom's making dinner, I can hear the rustle of plastic bags and opening and closing repeatedly of the bin, the clatter of knives agaisnt the grantie worktop, etc etc.
This post is pure and utter crap. Just the random ramblings of my inner mind trans..ported..[?].. via my fingertips against the keyboard. Woo. [sarcasm]
Glee is on tonight, then Ugly Betty tomorrow night, then skins on Thursday. Reality TV. Yaay.
Mention
to Stefan cause he's cool and awesome-amazing. An is soo a Calvin Klien model, he just has to accept it. He is one of a kind, a proper friend, I'm there for him and he's there for me even if it is just a random update on my life! He's "legit" a really amazing person. Don't mess with him or I'll find you and probably kill you. <3
And to Efa cause she's just been there alot this past while and I owe her so much for that. Helped me so much over the past few weeks and I love her forever for that. Anyone who messes with her will have me to get through first and trust that I will destroy you.
I Lovee that song. I love Queen to be honest. I used to just be kinda like, meh, whatever about them but now I really like them. Freddie Mercury, hero. End of.That song, Crazy Little Thing Called Love, always puts me in a super mood. I have it on repeat, yes I am that much of a sap. It's a toe-tapper. Haha. That's an under-used phrase nowadays. Only when a song is super awesomely good do people use it, even if then.
Speaking of good music, recently was at a Downhill gig there two weeks ago, their support were a very acoutic JHAH, Scuba Dice and the ever-awesome The Upgrades, I'm totally loving Scuba Dice right now. Someone go Google them please. They're crazy good. Gigging during midterm I heard too, anyone wanna buy me a ticket cause they love me? Totally not scrounging for money/tickets... *shifty eyes*
Thi post is way overdue, Just been busy peeps sorry, I know you don't really care so ah well, it's nice to pretend sometimes.
Aren't Dandelions pretty? I know they're classed as weeds but sure, for memories sake, or whatever, lets call them actual flowers. Remember when you were a kid and you'd run through the garden or some over grown lawn or the bushes near the playground or something, and even if they was just on little danelion, you'd pick it, take a deep breath and hope your wish of becoming a princess like the one's from the Disney fairytales would come true? [obviously that part is directed at the firls], as for the guys well... You's either wished for another Action Man, To be a soldier [ah bless the young innocence], or to be King of the World. Now if I see a dandelion, I'd pick it, deep breath and gently exhale and see how many will float away and land among the grass. I think they're cute little things. To me they aren't weeds. They're a reminder of innocence, of how the only thing we used to wish for was to be a princess. Life was so simple.
So we're reading The Kite Runner right now in English class. I wasn't crazy about it to begin with, but yeah, now I'm hooked, I'm so tempted to read ahead but I did that with Pride and Predjuduce in 3rd year and it completely ruined the book for me so, I'm not going to do that with this. It's really, luring, if thats the right word, someone correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel once I'm reading it, alone obviously, I hate reading with interruptions, that it just slowly pulls at your mind, the author, whose name I simply cannot spell, is amazing at descriptive writing. Not so much a book for the youger ones. This book is amazing. Anyone who hasnt read it, feel free. You will not put it down.
Madina Lake have released tour dates across Europe, if anyone knows the date for Dublin, or if their even doing on, feel free to let me know on twitter, link is as always up in the first info box under the picture of the pretty girl.
Click the link at @reply me if you know. Thank you.
I'm not so tired anymore, been getting more sleep, Monday though I was wrecked, the weekend caught up with me I guess. *yawn* Avioded drama today, just got what I tohught would turn bad out of the way, made my day even better.
Been watching Glee? O.M.G I knew it would turn into a teenage pregnancy, to "relate to todays issues" and a fake histerical pregnancy, wow. I love how shows these days are filled with liars. Haha. Liars never win.
I have Ugly Betty recorded downstairs, t'will make for some good viewing tomorrow. Yaay. Skins is also back. Reality TV nut? Maybe, only maybe... I don't watch Gossip Girl or 90210 though... Hmm...
Getting the Swine Flu jab tomorrow. *sad face* I don't like needles, not blood tests, injections, nothing, nothing that'll hurt my skin. Dude, like seriously. Ew.
Uhm, so yeah that's the most important updates on my life I can give right now...Fun fun. I'm so exciting eh? [sarcasm intended in that btw]
Life is good right now.
Birthday mention to Diarmuid. Happy Buurrffday dude. xD
Oh yeah I have a formspring. You can ask me anytihng totally anonymously, funny questions so far. It's just for fun so chill the buck out and don't be getting mean cause it makes you look silly. Asking me why I'm a poser? Wow. Really? You're proably more of a poser than I am so shush.
Are teachers meant to make our lives miserable? Grr. I hate a certain teacher in my school. Threatening me with discipline sheets and letters home via post so I can't stop her. Ugh. She's bitch. I hate her so much. I'm sorry if I don't want to participate in class because of a group of judgemental bitchy girls who I know will have a lovely chat about me afterwards. They tells us to take part is to build confidence? Eh I'm sorry, if you know me you'll know that I have sub-zero, if not less than that, confidence levels so if you don't mind I'd rather not participate in that class to avoid total humiliation. I hate school right now, it's just a sea of people passing from room to room every 40 minutes. I just want to get away for a while, forever even.
*receives Dairy Milk from father dearest in consolation for a shitty day*
Nom nom nom.
Parent teacher meetings today. Ah fack. Teachers just dont seem to like me this year. Like, hellooo? Earth to common sense? 5th year is tough stuff, don't expect me to be getting 100%, I'm an average student. I do homework and occaisionally study. Stop pressuring me! Speaking of pressure actually, wait and I tell you loyal-ish readers of my blog about what I found out the other day. I tihnk I know what I want to do with my life. Perhaps something in web design? Or multimedia? Or.. yeah something in that region because lets think seriously, I am not in anyway capeable ofd getting like 500 points. Realistically, like yeah okay 400 perhaps if I study from laike.. forever ago but like, I've an inclination that medicene and me are out the window, it's not a realistic aim considering I'll need like 600 points, uhm, no. So computers or web design and that are like 300-350 points so I could get that. ITT have a good course, tough place to get to though, pehaps DCU? or DIT? WE'll see. I'm really quite interested in that. I was shooting all over the place there for a while thinking music production (420pts in NUIM) but thanks to Mr. Points Calculator on careersportal.ie I can get somewhere around 400-410 points, lovely thinking isnt it? A website is deciding my future. *sigh* Happy days eh?
Fell in love slowly with Owl City, I heard them ages ago through some random dudes bebo page then I asked Stefan who were a good band and he said them so I listened, loved and now everyone's after them thanks to the radio stations across Dublin blasting out Fireflies. I heard someone call it their debut song. Haha. Naive people. No no, Owl City have 2 albums I think. Their a very awesome synthpop type band. Adam Young, le singer, wow. In Love with him.
Okay, school rant over. Been tweeting loads lately. Been sleeping a bit more too. Telling everyone I'm going asleep at like 11/half 11 then listening to my iPod until laike, 12 maybe a bit more, then falling asleep so I'm getting seven hours sleep, I just don't like the get up at half 7 routine. I could get up earlier but I love my bed too much. Didn't sleep too great last night now mind you. Kept waking up, adjusting position, then going back asleep. It happened at least 4 times. Grr. Darn teenage sleeping patterns.
Oh well,
Jeez this post is crapola.
Right-o, i'll edit this post if i want to laterrr after i shtudy.
Hi to Jonny, Stefan, Elise, Diarmuid, Lucy and Efa by the way ^.^
So I've had fucking Timbaland, Flo-Rida and T-Pain stuck in my head all day.
Results are in. Finally. Haven't failed anything, but didn't honour everything. Results weren't honestly too bad, something like this:
English - D1- 53% - pass
Irish - D1 - 54% - pass
Maths - B1- 79% - honour
French - D2 - 47% - pass
Home Ec - C3- 58% - honour
Economics - B3 - 70% - hounour
Chemistry - C3- 55% - honour [just about!]
I was freaking out all day, waiting to get back Chemistry, it was one of the worst, aside from French, but that was impossible and a good chunk of the class actually failed so passing it by 7% is okay I guess. I really have to get it together academically this term and not just work when I feel like it. I mean,going from a B/C average to a C/D average is like, frowned upon, cause like I know myself I'm capeable, but like, teachers and shit need to fuck off telling me that, I know I didn't try completely last term but shut up with the guilt trips, just cause I'm not the fucking class nerd, getting high B's and shit all the time like ughh, I don't care, not at this point in time, come back to me when I have energy to actually care mmk?
Speaking of energy, I really have like, none lately. I'm sleeping, I am. But it's like I'm at that point of having just woken up all day, you know the feeling of, "no no, just 5 more minutes.." *falls back asleep for 10mintues and has to rush to get ready* ughh, fuck. School just feels like such a burden lately. Like, lack of energy, the momentary 40minute shuffle from room to room is just such a chore when you've got books, folders, and a heavy bag, it's made worse when all you wanna do is go to the next classroom and some fucking little first year insists on having a chat with her "BFFFFL" beside the lockers, ughh, just fucking move! No one cares. I'm sure the little shit piece of info isn't life changing in the break of about 2 classes. For fuck sake. Honestly, sometimes people just get sooo annoying!!
Downhill gig on Saturday with the lovely Ms Efa O'Brien. Cannot fucking wait, had my tickets since before Christmas with prompting from the lovely Conor Walsh from the band. If he ever gets linked to this, Conor you rock xD haha. I can't wait, rock outt, and I have to get shit in Easons like a copy of The Kite Runner and..uhh..Something else that I'll remember later. I really should go down and record Celebrity Big Brother, I missed it last night so I'll probably be lost now. Damn reality TV, I caught the end of it, so I know they've failed their shopping challenge. That task was funny. Lol.
So because I couldn't sleep for a while last night I began thinking about things lately, and not so lately, not-so-lately meaning when I just completely shut myself off a few months ago, it feels like I only did it last week or something, but I honestly can't even remember how I felt at that time. It was numbing. I don't know what triggered me feeling like that, I just shut down, closed myself off from people, was very much reserved for that while and when I did start to come out of it, I remember being like halfway there and thinking "was it better when I shut people off or when I had people by my side no matter what?" I won't apologise for what I did because it's a bit late now. It's in the past and I've moved on, I'm myself again. It was a mistake and I've learned from it. People go through phases, that was one of many of mine.
It's still bloody freezing out so I literally grabbed the first pair of gloves I saw this morning whilst heading out to go wait on my bus. They had been sitting in the gap between bars of the rad and I put them on and it was like that feeling of putting on warm socks when your toes are nearly numb or when your really cold and drink a hot cup of tea, I was like "Ahhh now there's something I need every morning." So, my morning started well. Sporting of course the uniform, shirt and tie done cause I'm sick of being given out to for it, navy school coat, and red and black check scarf. No different than any other morning except for my mams red gloves I'd taken off the rad.
Texting with gloves is impossible btw.
See that pic up there? *scrolls up, sees, scrolls back down* isn't it cool? I love it. I have this lil thing for butterflies, I don't know what it is though. Could be their colours, how they're so free, how they can fly anywhere, they're so delicate and pretty and elegant. I dunno, I just have a lil thing for them. They're just so... I dunno, freee.
Knuckles are killing me today. -_-
Feels like there's a giant knife stuck in all of them. Especially my baby fingers or my ring fingers. Ughh. Paracetomal doesn't work on them either.
Pretty average post. Not too happy with it. =/
Click the twitter link in the top left where the info about me is to follow me.
Well, look at this, me going all new skin, again. I fucked up the last one and havent been on the computer much to be bothered to sort it out. Ah well. I like this one. No too crazy about the small default font though. I'll just change it when I post I suppose. Can't have it all right?
So yesterday was the first day I had been out properly, since the big freeze took its hold on the country. Jesus. So much panic over it. Thankfully it's over now.Not so thankfully we've got school tomorrow. When the freeze was at it's peak, it took up the whole SixOne news, I watched it on Friday evening, when the Minister for Education ordered that all schools be closed till Thursday. The updates flooding all over Facebook lik literally 2 minutes after that were incredible. Mainly just "OMJ ["j" for jonas -_-] no skwll til thursday whoop whoop bayubb" Haha. Funny. I felt like just going on and updating my staus saying something like "We do have school, the minister was high" just to freak everyone out. But I didn't. Fail. So, I spent my days, basically stuck in my house cause the snow was too slippy to drive on and parentals were only going out for needed things, and apparently, me seeing my friends isn't one of them. So, after Mr. Weather decided to unexpectidley change the temperature of the outside world, like I would know I had been cooped up getting cabin fever for nearly 2 full weeks, the snow began to melt. Rapidly. I went to sleep the night before last, snow blanketing the entire garden outside my window, woke up the yesterday, at least 2 inches down. It was so weird. Then last night I went to sleep, the snow was turned icy and patchy, woke up and its practically gone this morning. Amazing what a few degrees above freezing point can do to nearly a foot of snow isn't it?
So yesterday, as I said, I headed to town with a few peeps, we hung out, got some food as you normally do, then went to the lovely Coneworld to see Daybreakers, which admitidly I had heard nothing about, it's about vampires, but not like the Twilight shite. I hate Twilight, so I feel I can say its fucking shit, alod of fucking shit, if i want to and I do, I've said it. Shut up. Daybreakers is possibly the scariest film I've had to endure in my entire life. Go see it if you like blood and your basic human canibalism and by that I mean blood starved vampires lurking for Human blood as the country of America runs dry. I was scared for my life throughout the whole thing. Screaming at that fucking bat at the start and end. Screaming at every scary, half decayed vampire face that came on screen. Efa dear then decided to scare me more and say "imagine this in 3-D." Thanks Efa, I'll never be able to erase the image of blood coming at me through a cinema screen. After that we wandered about, going from cool shop to cool shop, I have found possibly thee coolest shop ever, Lucy's Lounge in Temple Bar. So cool, cheap and cheerful stuff. We went downstairs to the "bargain basement" if you will, totally loving it. All accessories are handmade. So Efa and Sionnán are going to make stuff for. Excited for them? Yes.
School tomorrow. Not looking forward to it. Fuck off. Ughh. I shouldn't really say that about school but I just hate it so much. The monoteny, and just how every day just drags out immencly. It kills. Like, educationally yeah its great but take away the education side of it and its just a building filled with bitchy girls who make smart remarks every time someone they know/don't know walks by. Grow up. Your pathetic. Mmk? Thanks.
Just realised this font is rather large and I haven't written as much as I thought. Total fail. Grr. They're glass shards btw in that picture. Thank you to Google for gerating oddly awesome images everytime I type in something weird.
Having such a lazy day today, lounging in my cantos and Boyzone tshirt.
Yeah I do ♥ Boyzone. Haha. Joke made.
Feeling tired and light headed today. Hmm, don't know why. Cause I went to sleep at like 1 last night/this morning. Ah well. Lets hope it passes eh?
Kind of want some tea rihgt now, there's no gold blend tea downstairs, the kenyan blend doesn't taste the same. Mom said it's lonely. I disagree.
Still wanting a job, I need cash loiike okayy? *d4 accent*.
It's all windy and yuck outside. Just want to get back into bed, but then I won't sleep tonight, and how on earth will I ever live in school if I haven't gotten a full 8 hours [italics indicate extreme sarcasm]
Mom made me wake up at like 12:30 today, I went into her and she asked me why I sleep so much, my reply was simply "I'm a teenager, it's what we do. We like to sleep" I wasn't trying to be cheeky, just honest. I do love sleeping, so when I'm on holidays, please don't anyone ever wake me. Thats why I take my phone off vibrate, anyone who texts me when I'm asleep, I won't reply until I wake up myself. I hate vibrate on phones. Ugh. Lol.
I think I'll go now.
This post is rather uninteresting and I'm running out of things to say.
Twitter link is in the box entitled with my name.
That picture isn't me for any first time readers. I wish it was. Damn that girl and her pretty-ness. I can't figure out how to change it though. HTML codes confuse me slightly, but they're manageable.
